Q: Does your steering wheel get hot to the touch in summer? - Andrew
A: I live in a desert, Andrew. EVERYTHING gets hot to the touch (even in winter!)
Q: What’s the best part about wearing gloves?
A: No fingerprints!
Q: Are you a geek? - Jennifer
A: Depends, Jennifer. Do you think geeks are hot? If so, damn straight, skippy.
Q: What’s the best part of being you?
A: Being me. There’s really no downside.
Q: Is there any computer you haven’t been able to fix?
A: No. I spay and neuter all computers to help control the PC population. Those Dells and HPs breed like #$%@!ing rabbits!
Q: Is there any such things as a superior operating system?
A: Sure. Whichever OS has more users. DUH.
Q: Is it true a geek would prefer a computer to a hot woman?
A: No, that’s a nerd. The two are easily confused.
Q: Have you seen the movies Hackers and War Games?
A: Yup. Otherwise I would be kicked out of the Guild of The Silicon Brotherhood.
Q: What is the Guild of the Silicon Brotherhood?
A: Holy $%#@!ing $%#@!, did I say that out loud?
Q: Yep. So what is it?
A: Let’s just say it’s members are made up entirely of the kids that couldn’t afford to go to Space Camp, ok?
Q: How many geeks does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. We’re all too busy banging your sister.
Q: Just what the heck is this blog for?
A: When you find out please let me know; I’ve always been curious…
Q: How many computers do you have?
A: 3 or so running; the rest (5-6) are in storage. One is my main rig and the other is my spare box/ test rig.
Q: Why don’t you advertise your website?
A: Don’t need to. You found it. Looking into anti-advertising…
Q: How many hits do you get a day?
A: None despite a smart mouth thanks to quick reflexes that came in the same package as the smart mouth.
Q: What’s your biggest pet peeve?
A: I don’t have a pet peeve; I respect peeves enough to leave them in the wild, happy and free. I can’t stand people that capture peeves, break them of their spirit and make them wear funny hats for an audience of total dipwads.
Q: Are you a republican or democrat?
A: I wear boxers. Feel free to interpret.
Q: Why don’t you post about current events / tragedies like [tragic event reference deleted]?
A: There are too many people that do that now! You hear me, CNN?!
Q: What kind of shows do you watch?
A: Dirty Jobs, America’s Deadliest Catch, Top Chef and anything sci-fi of course like the Stargate(s), Battlestar Galactica and Smallville.
Q: Do you have any sisters?
A: Not that I know of unless Ma and Pa have been lying to me all these years.
Q: If you had a baby sister would you be a cool older brother?
A: I would SO be a cool older brother. The minute she wanted to dress up like a flower I’d put on my Frankenstein makeup and take her down to the lake and play.
Q: What was your most embarrassing moment?
A: (1) Raising my hand in the 6th grade when asked if I believed that George Washington cut down that cherry tree or (2) trying to avoid running into my reflection in a wall-sized mirror at an arcade when I was 10, looking up and thinking I had a twin.
Q: Do you make a lot of mistakes?
A: Everyone does. The key is learning to cover all traces you made them. Usually involves a shovel, shallow pit and a hundred pounds of lye.
Q: Do you have any pets?
A: As a friend of mine once said, yes. Her name is Cathy.
Q: Do you love animals?
A: It depends on which state is asking as to whether I say yes or no. Know your rights and the law, kids!
Q: Can you really juggle?
A: Yep. After years of “Live Cow Juggling” in chat rooms I learned how to do it IRL. (In Real Life)
Q: What’s the best part living in Las Vegas?
A: No snow. And watching stupid tourists. Both never get old. Oh, and watching the news to see how hot it’s outside and adjusting the central air accordingly.
Q: If you had a dream job what would it be?
A: Walking behind Jim Louderback and picking up all the hi-tech gadgets that fall out of his pockets! (Call me, Jim!)
Q: Are you ever serious?
A: If you screw over or treat a friend of mine badly, yes. Otherwise, no. And if my life ever depended on being serious, I’d be a goner.
Q: What’s your favorite song?
A: When driving it’s Tonight I Fell Asleep at the Wheel by Barenaked Ladies. Otherwise it’s Godsmack’s I Stand Alone.
Q: How long have you been into computers?
A: Since I was 16 and laid eyes on my first one, a TRS-80 Model I. It was love at first sight. *sigh*
Q: What animated character do you feel the most like?
A: Stitch! Disney stole my whole personality, and obviously modeled him totally after me. Not that I mind, I can do the voice and I think they got my likeness right. Cute, blue and fluffy…
Q: When will you stop answering our questions?
A: Now looks like as good a time as any!